K here's one:
At the Hootenanny or however you spell it:
Crystal: Ok I needs me a hot man here and there is very slim pickins. :fixes gingham ruffled skirt so it shows her knee highs with bows, then wishes she has boobs she could adjust to hang out of her matching checkered shirt
"I'm on a mission to scare as many boys as possible into being my date"
Bird: talking to cupcakes: " I have been into Dave since 2nd grade ok.. so he is MINE. I was writing fanfic about him when you were watching punky brewster and listening to NEW KIDS.
Cupcakes: "Dude New kids were out far after my davey, In fact his afro even inspired that marky mark guy.
Bird "He's still mine,ok." she then proceeds to take a front row center spot by the stage that Dave is due to appear in 6 hours. "A girl must be prepared" :spritzes her "Winebloodforu" perfume all over and makes everyone within a 10 mile radius gag.
Cupcakes "While she's waiting for her romeo by the stage.. I'll go pretend to be a maid and serve some grapes up to Daves trailer. We'll both walk hand in hand and show Bird what is up. :hides behind a bush in front of trailer, plotting next move::
"These two are hopeless. I could have done Mike Ness and been back already x4. But then again there aren't too many in line for his crinkly ass these days, so I'm not sure if i'd come out the winner here."
::curtain goes down and Crystal throws in the towel: Til next time on "All my menz"